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Wedding Speech Do's and
Don'ts
Over the years I've given
several public speeches, and witnessed many more wedding speakers. So
based on my own experiences and those that have shared theirs with me,
here are a few do's and don'ts to consider, with a few photography ones
thrown in for good measure.
Don't leave it to the
last minute. Writing a good speech requires time and a little
dedication, so starting early gives you plenty of time to try different
things.
Do practice your
speech. If you know your speech well enough, then when the time comes to
saying it in public, it will flow much more smoothly and even if you get
an interruption you'll easily slip back into the flow again. Also by
practicing you can see what works and what doesn't, meaning you have
time to modify the speech long before it gets a public airing.
Don’t reuse old
jokes, everyone’s heard them already. Whilst getting a laugh always
helps, using a joke that everyone has heard before will only kill it
rather then help you along.
Do talk slowly and
clearly. If you're particularly nervous your voice will naturally speed
up and will often get quieter. Speaking slowly allows you to think as
you read, and also allows you to pause more easily to give more effect
to your speech.
Don't simply read out
your speech verbosely from sheet after sheet, this will only make you
sound monotone, even for the funniest of lines. Instead use prompt cards
to keep your on track.
Do tell the truth,
the whole truth and nothing but the truth, and this is especially true
at a wedding.
Don't worry about
being heckled, it will happen, so be ready for it. If you prepare one or
two good one liners to retort you can soon "kill the heckler" and be
back on track.
Do if using props to
aid your speech, make them big enough for everyone to see and also give
enough time for the photographer to capture them for the album.
Don't forget to keep
it balanced. You'll need to ensure your speech isn't either one-sided
towards one particular party or family, plus remember you'll probably
have a mixture of ages in the room - so keep it at least clean for the
kids!
Do avoid the top ten
"one liners" from your favourite wedding speech website, because I can
tell you from bitter experience, everyone has used the same line. The
joke “This is not the first time today do I've risen from a warm seat
clutching a piece of paper...” is quickly becoming a scratched record!
Don’t use jokes that
only a few people will understand, e.g. old school jokes. Whilst they
might be hilarious, no one else will get them, so save for the bar
later.
 Do structure your
speech, this will ensure the whole thing flows and will stop you from
waffling if you need to try and regain your place in the flow of the
speech.
Don't, under any
circumstance mention previous partners, this rarely gets a laugh!! Also
on the same topic leave the mother-in-law jokes to stage comedians who
are short of material...
Do make it personal
to your couple and your audience. Giving a generic speech about "what
happens on a stag night; stays on a stag night" will only choke your
audience. Think about who you are speaking about and tailor your speech
specifically to them, such as him being a car fanatic or the bride being
the karaoke queen. That way everyone can relate to your stories and will
almost help you tell them...
Don’t use negative
stories for cheap laughs – “Doesn’t she look good now she’s lost weight”
has never worked, and probably never will.
Do ensure you have an
end to your speech, and even better if you can save the best till last.
Don’t be upset if the
photographer moves the “thank you” flowers off the table once they've
been given to your special guests. Plus remember huge flower
arrangements and decorations on the top table don’t allow the
photographer or your guests to see you.
Do coordinate your
speech with other speakers, as there is nothing worse then getting to
the third speech and the prior two speakers have used all the same
material as you!
And finally;
Don’t make your
speech too funny, as the photographer I can't hold the camera still if
I'm laughing too much!
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Guiding principle no 2,
remember that your speech is about the bride and groom and their special
day. If you keep this in mind, and ask yourself would they really want
me to say this then you can never go far wrong. Every wedding couple
will have a different view as to what they think is acceptable on their
special day, so ensure you stay within those boundaries.
4) Before you start imagine
the end of the speech, imagine everyone clapping as you take a bow.
Year" certificate as well as the
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